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Post  Alexis2012 on Fri Feb 15, 2013 8:00 pm

Wow, I can't believe it's been this long since I was here. These past few months have been such a blur. I don't remember exactly what got me off plan. I think in anticipation of my vacation in St. Thomas I decided to switch to low carb again and stuff myself full of bacon, eggs, steak, etc. Well I eventually fell off that plan and gave up altogether.

I was then let go from my job so that caused a deep depression and I ballooned to 265lbs. I have been trying to get back on something, anything to get this weight off. Low carb goes well for a week or two and then I crash into some carbs. I have been thinking about starting 5 bites again but for some reason I had it in my mind that it was 5 bites per day and not per meal so it seemed like an impossible diet to try again. Anyway, I decided to come check to see how everyone is doing and got to reading my old journal again. It's funny how you only remember the bad and not the good. I realized that I was achieving some serious results with this diet and was doing pretty well.

So here I am ready to give it another try. This is one EASY/HARD diet lol. I think of all the diets I've tried this diet is the most forgiving though.

Alright here goes:
b: none
l: 5 bites egg sandwich
D:hmmm, I don't know but I already know I'll be saving a bite for something chocolate.
W: 265 - wow.

I am so happy to see new faces here and I can't wait to read about your journey. Snow white I see you are still fighting the good fight. Keep up the good work.
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Post  Dmac on Fri Feb 15, 2013 9:11 pm

welcome back Alexis it's funny I was reading through some of my old posts last night because I've been struggling so bad lately and it got me refocus again sometimes you need to see that you've done in the past to be able to do it again Very Happy
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Post  Alexis2012 on Sat Feb 16, 2013 3:13 am

Thanks, Dmac. It's good to see you are back here posting. Your journey is amazing and keeps me believing.

So dinner went well. I ended up drinking a cup of coffee before dinner because I felt like I would eat everything in sight as I prepared dinner. Note to self, don't let myself get that hungry between lunch and dinner. The coffee helped me to stay on plan. I know I just need to make it to SUNDAY - DAY 3.

I am still blown away by my ability to eat only 5 bites. I think knowing that it is a 5 bite meal helps me to feel fuller quicker. It's like I put less on my plate and eat much sloooooweeerr and just savor. By the last bite my hunger pangs are gone and I can walk away from the table.

I find that it isn't while eating that I struggle. It's when I am not eating and just thinking about food. Its the cravings that are my downfall.

Since it's only 10 PM I still have a fight ahead of me to stay on plan tonight but being accountable to this journal is really helping.

See you tomorrow - DAY 2!!!
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Post  Snow White on Sat Feb 16, 2013 9:18 pm

Hey, Alexis....sooooooooo glad to see you are back! You were rockin' out on this diet before and you can and WILL do it again!!! You are one day ahead of me on your restart! Monday will be my day 3, so today is my day 1. I've gained a lot of weight just b/c I have simply been eating like a maniac and the more you eat the more you want to eat...you know how it goes, girl!

I am terribly sorry to hear about your job! These are terrible economic times...I don't know how everyone in America isn't 300+ pounds b/c of it! Clearly eating is our vice and as far as vices go that's the one I would want to have rather than say drugs, alcohol, etc. But in some ways, food can be a harder addiction to break simply b/c you can't just quit eating...but we can come close to quitting eat by 5 biting. I have to be mindful that I am breaking an addiction.
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Post  Alexis2012 on Sun Feb 17, 2013 12:57 am

Oh, I hadn't realized I started a new journal -oops. I guess it means a new start like Dmac lol.

Snow White - miss ya girl. Thanks for stopping by to wish me well. Losing my job was pretty awful at first but now I am a homeschooling mom and I LOVE IT. I homeschool my 4 year old and her best friend all week long and it is the best experience ever. I always wanted to be a homeschooling mom but that seemed like an impossible desire to have. I am looking into how to maybe make this into a real thing and get some business income coming in.

Everyone- thanks for the encouragement.

So today went very well. I woke up to find that the scale read 263lbs so 2lbs down from day 1.

B: coffee w/ creamer/splenda
L: I bought an egg mc muffin from McDonalds this morning and saved it until I was really hungry around 2PM
D: 3 bites of rice, veggies, and chicken. I am saving 2 bites for the chocolate cookie I bought from the green market today.

I realized right before dinner that I was getting that "eat more than 5 bites" feeling so I drank two glasses of water before eating. That seemed to help me stick to my 3 mouthfuls. Now I am drinking a little coffee and then for a late night snack I will have my last two bites. I need a late night snack because I am usually up until like 2AM prepping for the school and job hunting. I am a real night owl.

Day 3 tomorrow. I am so excited to be back and doing this with everyone. This is it guys, I can feel it.
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Post  Snow White on Sun Feb 17, 2013 3:18 am

Great job on your bites today! Keep going and eat whatever you want to eat! That's the easiest way to stick with it. You can do this! Twisted Evil Twisted Evil Twisted Evil
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Post  Dmac on Sun Feb 17, 2013 5:30 am

Your doing great mc muffin sounds really good I'm doing the candy bars for now when i start five biting other foods again i think I'll have one
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Post  Alexis2012 on Sun Feb 17, 2013 4:44 pm

Gotta love day 3!!Another pound down and no hunger when I woke up. Thanks for the encouraging words. I feel hopeful and that is a feeling I haven't had in a while about my weight.

Leaving food on my plate is pretty hard, but it is nice to know that I can eat whatever I want for my next bites. It may be what I am eating now or anything else I want. The openness iand freedom s what keeps me going.

B: nothing. I am about to make myself a cup of coffee
L: prob my egg sandwich. I love scrambled eggs on toast. It really fills me up.
D: probably leftovers from yesterday.
W: 262 - a few more lbs to go before I am out of the 60's. I haven't weight this much since after my pregnancy 4 yrs ago.

I hope everyone is doing well. We are only 5 bites away from MORE FOOD lol. Stay strong.
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Post  ElleBella on Sun Feb 17, 2013 7:35 pm

I love your new Post girl.. I am so happy you are back.. really missed you.. Yay.. you are doing so great!! Really motivational honey!! bounce cheers bounce
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Post  Snow White on Sun Feb 17, 2013 8:56 pm

On 5 bites we have lots of leftovers! I had fish for dinner last night, then fish again for lunch today. You're doing great! Keep on going! Arrow Arrow Arrow Arrow
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Post  Alexis2012 on Mon Feb 18, 2013 12:06 am

I just finished dinner. I ate much earlier than I planned, but I worked up an appetite overhauling my daughter's room.

I ate the same meal as yesterday. 3 mouthfuls and left two bites for the last cookie from the farmer's market. I felt so satisfied and so proud of myself leaving the table. I mean, the food was delicious, but what really amazed me was the absence of guilt while eating. I mean eating is usually such a conflicting experience. I am excited about what I am going to eat, yet I am upset at myself for eating it, and then I hate myself for having eaten it. It is such a vicious cycle lol.

I wish I could imprint this feeling of success and pride I have in myself right now so that I never forget it.

Alright, I'll check back in later after my last two bites.

so in summary-
B:coffee
L: egg sandwich- 1 bite of a cookie. I almost went over my bites, but I quickly shoved the leftover cookie in my daughter's face lol. She didn't complain. At least it was organic lol.
D: chicken, rice, veggies. 2 bites left over for a cookie tonight.

It looks like today is going well for many of us. cheers TNT and press forward.
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Post  ElleBella on Mon Feb 18, 2013 5:46 pm

Wow you are really in the groove now girl.. so proud of you.. keep going honey flower
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Post  Alexis2012 on Mon Feb 18, 2013 8:02 pm

Hey everyone,

So today almost went south. My friend brought over some lunch from Burger King and of course instead of bringing me just 1 burger she bought each of us 2 burgers. I sat down across from her and felt truly conflicted about whether I should eat both. The weird thing was that all my feelings were mostly about how she would feel if I didn't eat both burgers. I wanted to show appreciation and I didn't want her to feel bad about eating two when I was only eating one burger. I decided to eat both burgers and just count that as lunch and dinner. I knew it would be hard to endure the rest of the day without eating, but I decided it was better to make that sacrifice than endure potential awkwardness with my friend.

Time and time again I am amazed at my willingness to sacrifice my well being for others WITHOUT them even asking. This friend is thin and even if she wasn't it wouldn't be her falling off plan. I would be sacrificing three days of hard work for one meal and I would be left with the feelings that would follow. Why do I do that? Why do I rarely put my goals and needs first? Why make sacrifices for people who have asked for nothing from me. Why is social eating so complicated?

Anyway, the good news is that after we ate the burger she said she was full and wouldn't be eating the second one. I took a sigh of relief and said I was full too, which I was. So if she had eaten the second burger, I would have joined her, but at what cost and for what? Sometimes my own personal issues with food distorts my perspective.

I am happy to report that I only ate the tiny burger and 3 fries, which probably amounted to 5 bites anyway. I was on the verge of falling over the cliff and it would have been for nothing.

B: coffee
L: 1 tiny double burger from BK
D: hmm, something new. Tired of leftovers.
we: 263- up a pound. Not happy about that but I know fluctuations happen. I think the increase may have left me feeling a tad bit vulnerable/discouraged, and therefore more susceptible to falling off plan. The scale is a blessing and a curse.

Alright, TNT my good friends. Don't give up especially if it is only to please others or because there is a bump in the road. Warriors stay the course. cheers

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Post  Snow White on Mon Feb 18, 2013 8:27 pm

Sounds like you are doing great and starting to really get some self-control.

Hating ourselves only makes us want to eat more which makes the problem worse...so I say we make a pact to STOP. When we screw up, let's just own it and move on. Even the greatest warriors fall down sometimes, why should we be any different. Let's stop the self-punishment and start some self-love! rabbit rabbit rabbit
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Post  ElleBella on Mon Feb 18, 2013 8:57 pm

Im with Snow.. totally what I have been saying for a while now.. its just a blip.. shake your self off and get back on plan.. We 3 tend to self sabitoge.. we really can learn from each other on this one.. Twisted Evil
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Post  Alexis2012 on Mon Feb 18, 2013 9:27 pm

It is just that I came so close to messing up and I know I would have regretted it. I really need this work. Once and for all.

You ladies are right. Instead of a pity party I should be celebrating that I stayed true to 5 bites. Glass half-full. got it.

Man, I am so ready for dinner lol. That tiny burger wasn't filling like my egg sandwiches have been.
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Post  ElleBella on Mon Feb 18, 2013 11:39 pm

I find that too.. egg sandwich last much longer than a slider.. a slider is mainy all bun... You are rocking it girl!!
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Post  Snow White on Tue Feb 19, 2013 1:38 am

I love egg sandwiches! Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

Keep going Alexis! We are in this together! Twisted Evil Twisted Evil Twisted Evil Twisted Evil Twisted Evil Twisted Evil
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Post  Alexis2012 on Tue Feb 19, 2013 1:58 am

Dinner was meat sauce with pasta. I cooked way too much for 5 bites, but it'll make plenty of leftovers for other type of dishes.

Ella, I felt so weak today in the afternoon. I could barely keep my eyes open during home school. That slider did absolutely nothing for me. I kept hearing snow white in my head telling me that my self-control is improving. I kept myself busy and stuck it out.

It meant a lot to know we are all in this together.
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Post  ElleBella on Tue Feb 19, 2013 5:36 pm

I have been making my egg sandwiches at home.. so delish.. you are doing fab.. you are getting stronger.. Yay.. good job on the left overs I love them too.. lol
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Post  Snow White on Tue Feb 19, 2013 11:06 pm

You are doing great, Alexis! Your are in control of what you put in your stomach! You ARE doing this! bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce bounce
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Post  Alexis2012 on Thu Feb 21, 2013 2:31 am

What a busy day yesterday and today! I only had 1 kid to homeschool yesterday so I started a home improvement project that is just too big to finish lol. So my meat sauce didn't agree with me (even 5 bites worth). It was so yummy though.

Anyway, nothing major to report. My weight is still the same, which is strange. No coffee today so I'll see if that helps. My clothes are much looser though so I know things are still going in the right direction. Ooh, I bought this chocolate flavored peanut butter spread and some banana. I plan to get very creative tomorrow for my bites )

B: nothing
L: individual pizza
D: chinese food. Chicken & broccoli
W: same

Alright, I hope everyone is going strong. I'm so exhausted. My daughter is having a sleepover tonight at our house. I hear them going nuts again. Gotta go.
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Post  Snow White on Thu Feb 21, 2013 2:58 am

I remember us talking about that nutella in the old days. We'll have to find that post. Was it a bite of banana dipped in nutella and then rolled in something else? Do you remember that? I'm so glad you're back! queen
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Post  Alexis2012 on Thu Feb 21, 2013 6:16 pm

ugh, guys, my stomach is still on the fritz. Looks like I'm in stomach bug territory. I am not sure how to handle this. I am starving since my breakfast has gone right through me. I am only drinking water to stay hydrated.

Snow white, what I did in the past was put the spread on a hot dog bun and put the banana inside like a hot dog and CHOW DOWN lol. That was going to be my breakfast this morning. but since I wasn't feeling well I decided to just have toast. I wasn't sure if the banana would help or worsen my situation.

I haven't weighed this morning. I am sure I am down, but it is not from 5 bites lol.

Ok, hope everyone is having a good day so far. TNT.
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Post  Snow White on Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:29 am

Alexis, are you doing okay??? I love you I love you I love you I love you
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